Odisseus’ Mom

I cancel or exactly withdraw one post which I have made last night. My husband says to me that I should edit some words from it, his reason is that a private thing should not made publicly through the post I’ve made. I disagree with that reason, but I decide to cancel rather than to edit it. Even though he said that it is a good posting but, I prefer not to edit it and unpublish it. That post will only be my (our) secret then.

Economic claims as the study of social science that deals with the ways in which men and societies seek to satisfy their material needs and desires (Albert Rees 1968). It’s quite a very confident definition I believe.

In the middle of my lonely-studying-night, I find an interesing paragraph excerpted from the book ”The economic approach to human behavior” wrote by Gary S. Becker (1976).

“According to the economic approach, a person decide to marry when the utility expected from marriage exceeds that expected from remaining single or from additional search for a more suitable mate. Similarly, a married person terminates his (or her) marriage when the utility anticipated from becoming single or marrying someone else exceeds the loss in utility from separation in utility from separation, including losses due to physical separation from one’s children, division of joint assets, legal fees, and so forth.”    

My husband once said that, “One should marrying someone just right before the marginal utility of the relationship of the two persons begins to diminish.”  In this term, my husband also uses an economic approach in defining the decision of marriage. But what happened to us was, I am quite sure, that at the time he proposed me to marry him, we didn’t even have the so called special relationship yet. We worked as colleagues at the office at that time, nothing was really special.  

We didn’t even have the special utility from our relationship, except the utility to finish the job as perfect as possible as a team. Suddenly, his proposal, came on one sunny afternoon while I was in Makassar doing some research, changed everything between us. It happened right one week before Ramadhan three years ago. I  couldn’t explain very clear why was at that time I had a unique happy feeling for being proposed by this guy-from-the-office. The stories went very fast following the short message that afternoon. And 4 months after that proposal, we got married in a small mosque near my neighborhood. I’d like to admit here that it is a love marriage afterall!

Can some economists explain me about this phenomena?

1] Dengan menyebut nama Allah Yang Maha Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang. [2] Segala puji bagi Allah, Tuhan semesta alam, [3] Maha Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang, [4] Yang menguasai hari pembalasan. [5] Hanya kepada Engkaulah kami menyembah dan hanya kepada Engkaulah kami mohon pertolongan [6] Tunjukilah kami jalan yang lurus, [7] (yaitu) jalan orang-orang yang telah Engkau anugerahkan nikmat kepada mereka, bukan (jalan) mereka yang dimurkai dan bukan (pula jalan) mereka yang sesat.

poem

every time i try to write one

never succeed in just

writing a sentence

perhaps it is

my heart which is

need to be

more open to the beauty

and miracles that happens

or maybe it is

my tongue which is

could not speaks eloquently

i do not know what to say

anymore, i have lost my words already

by: Anonim at FAI Fasilkon UI

Jadilah manusia-manusia langit
Yang dengan sayapnya dapat meringankan beban bumi
Jadilah manusia-manusia langit
Dengan biru lembutnya, mampu memberi keteduhan pada bumi
Jadilah manusia-manusia langit dengan sejuta keutamaannya
Ia istimewa karena rela berkorban, dengan tubuhnya ia payungi bumi
Agar tidak kepanasan …
Ia menjadi mulia, karena baginya… memberi adalah sebuah keindahan,

Keindahan dan keindahan …

Dan ia perlu menerima
Menerima sebuah kekuatan untuk menjalankan tugasnya
Karenanya …
Di pagi hari ia berdzikir
Saat siang ia bekerja dan
Malam hari ia berkhalwat dengan Rabbnya
Sebab tanpa Rabb-nya… Ia pasti bukan apa-apa…

by: Anonim at FAI Fasilkom UI

Ibunda…
Di tirai pagi kubersandar pada dinding kesedihan
Di senandung alam kuberbaring pada rajutan kerinduan

Tidak bunda…
Rindu ini hadir dalam doa anandamu
Agar surga selalu hadir untukmu
Bukan hanya di telapak kakimu

How happy and surprised I am, Ody. The first time I tune in to radio kita in
Netherlands, a friend in Oosterhout, Breda (a town between Eindhoven and Tilburg) send me a message and song. Thanks to Mba Elly Agus Purwanto in Breda, for the support during my lonely studying nights.

Assalamu’alaikum wr. wb.

Odisseus, my dear boy. You know that started from a few days a ago I’ve made a promise just for myself to start writing in English. But this is not permanently perhaps, because I might still want to use Indonesian everytime I feel I want to use it. Firstly, thank God that my blog appearance starts to comeback to it’s initial performance. 

Secondly, I’d like to share a story about last night when we had a birthday party. This time was Herni’s birhday party. I was helping her doing the shopping and cooking all day in her kitchen. It was very exhausting for both of us, actually there were three of us (plus the very helpful person Adrianus) who was doing all of those things. Herni had set a menu for the dinner, it was salad with grotesaus (a Dutch culinary), fried noodle, tofu with paprika ala Herni, fried chicken wings, tempe bacem, jelly fruit with vanilla saus, and last but not least is Indonesian gado-gado. Based on our counting there were 15-20 names in our invitation list, but apparently Herni is too famous for ISS student, the pary last night in her room was crowded by more than 40 international students in ISS. Thank God again, we had enough food for all of us. Avi and Mas Wira become the volunteers to cook Indonesian gado-gado, Mbak Catha was very generous to bring a big bowl of home made lasagna. And thanks to Mirna for the birthday cake.  

I have several photos about party last night, since I also performed as an amateur party photographer. Well, it was a nice and cheerful party, just right in the middle of our study recess preparation for the exam next week, it’s good to relax ourselves a bit from the exam preparation tension. Once again, “Happy Birthday Herni”! Thanks everybody for the contributions!

Assalamu’alaikum, Ody honey my dear boy, I only want to say a little thing in this short moment. I’m just finished watching Sr. Elmo’s Fire, the old movie from 80’s, you probably don’t even know what it is, but perhaps your daddy does. My old friend, Dhaniel came to my dorm this afternoon from
Amsterdam, just to bring me a couple of movies that I’ve been longing for. God, it was such a beautiful movie. Watching it alone just myself facing the notebook’s LCD screen made me feel very lonely, how I want your daddy to be here Ody. I miss him and you a lot here.

Now, it’s already 1 am in the morning, I’ve got to get back to my readings honey. Be a sholeh boy, I believe that you will. Without have to mention, you will find out that I love you and always keep the smile of your face always in my heart. And you will always find me kissing and hugging you in your dreams.

Wassalamu’alaikum wr. wb.

Ibu  

For my beloved husband: Maddaremmeng A. Panennungi.

I write only to show my despair, the exam is coming on my face but all of a sudden the result of my diagnostic test broke my confident. Thank God that I have a unique way of expression everytime I feel that I am being offended. Well, like usual and you already know it very good, I simply just do something spontaneously just to prove that someone/somebody’s wrong about me. Some post that I’ve made this afternoon show that. My despair (and especially your comment) brings a motivation to start using (writing especially) English correctly. But again, I have to remind you that I do what I want to do, without somebody can push me, what and when, it’s all up to me to decide. 

I am not mad at you, I just mad at myself sometimes. Now I found me has forgive myself and my stupidity in English. InsyaAllah, I will give the best that I can just for you and our dearest son Odisseus…(this sentence has a sound like dangdut you know… or in English we can say it mellow :))